Where has the FIRE gone??

Do you remember Christmas morning when you were little the anticipation and excitement you had to see the tree full of presents. (my parents would put all the presents under the tree Christmas eve after we were all asleep) so waking up and seeing the tree from the top of our stairs was something me and my three little sisters could not wait for. It was crazy.

Why don't we have that fire to talk to God? He has given us so much more than our parents could even more Jesus gave us our parents! So why do we not have that fire for him to get to know him?

I high school I could feel that I wanted to know Jesus and I wanted to spend time in his word. Heck I even liked it, I knew I would learn something and it would encourage me for the day and anything I had to do that day. But over the last couple of years when I have needed him most where has that fire gone?? I really wish I knew.
Over the past two years what could have put out this fire?

-It is college?
oAcademics demands
oPhysical demands
oMilitary demands
-New friends
oNot all Christian
-Movies (bad influences)
-Music (not beneficial)

There are a multitude of reasons I could blame for dumping water on that fire.
But no matter what put it out…I WANT IT BACK!!!!
I want it but I do not like it. Every day it is hard to read by bible (I do not want to do it). I want to pray (but I do not know what to say or have a desire to ask for help). But there is something that I know to be true, that is that God has great plans for me. Amazing plans that I cannot even begin to imagine and I know that if I am not close to him. I will not be ready to be used by him when the time comes. I want to be ready. I spend so much time preparing myself to be an officer, learning discipline in my studies (which I do a lot of), physical discipline (building my body to meet the challenges of my profession) and developing a mind ready to handle the demands of a leader who one day will make life and death decisions.

I have to feed on the word of God, to stay alive. But I do not to do. It is like in this song “the good I want to do I don’t do and the bad I don’t want to do I do” Jesus is fighting for all of us though. He talks about how is hems in our hearts so that we have no choice but to turn but to him. We are forces to see that we are not strong enough and that no one can save us but him.

Therefore I will block her path with thorn bushes;
I will wall her in so she cannot find her way.
She will chase after her lovers but not catch them;
She will look for them but not find them.
Hosea 2:6-7

God is talking about a woman trapped and seeking relief in other lovers but she cannot fill the hole in her heart. I have that hole you have that hole and there is only one person who can fill it and not matter if we want to or not we have to seek after him. Because it is a matter of survival.

The speaker at FCA talked about this this morning. Getting in the word, and how he cannot live his day without it.

Starting the day without God is like not eating today, you may be able to get by for one day or two or three it will hurt excruciatingly but you may live but that life without the help and assistance of God is not sustainable. He does not want us to be in that pain he want to help us and grow us into the people he created us to be.

That is all I have for now, this was weighing on my heart this morning and I had to share

Yours always,
Joey